Grand Legends of the Old West

General George Armstrong Custer

Oh, that bastard cuss Custer

just couldn’t cut the mustard.

And thus the dastard bit dust.

His last stand was a mass bust.

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Wyatt Earp

What is a man?

Consider Wyatt Earp; why he wasn’t worth a burp

when it comes to the measure of a man.

Real men are good and kind; they show love; are more refined 

than those thugs such as Wyatt and his clan.

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Wild Bill Hickok

You cannot say it’s fact that he enjoyed to kill,

but many men were slain by the guns of Wild Bill.

The lesson to be learned is, brutes like Hickok fall

 at the hands of punks like the vengeful Jack McCall.

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Billy the Kid and Jesse James

When compiling a list like this 

of such legends, I’d be remiss

if I did not mention the names

Billy the Kid and Jesse James.

Were they heroes, like Robin Hood;

misunderstood, and mainly good?

Ruthless killers is what they were:

Filthy dog and a loathsome cur.